After I posted last night, I started to get really dizzy. I was doing my hair (I like to do it the night before) and had to stop to sit down for a bit. I have a heart problem that is actually pretty minor, but I refuse to take my medication for it. Why? Because beta blockers make you gain weight, and I freak out any time I take them. So instead, I deal with rapid heart beats from time to time. It went on all night and is still going on. Here’s for hoping it will end soon!
Calorie Count- 706
Today I ate a lot more than usual. I actually felt hunger… a feeling I am not comfortable with. To anyone who doesn’t understand anorexia, it isn’t that i never get hungry, I just don’t like to eat. It is a lot like vacuuming or doing the dishes. An absolute chore. Plus, eat too much or the wrong things and you end up fat. Certainly not what i want! People tell me that i look great, but I think I can do better. Whenever I feel hunger, I am sure to stamp it out. I will drink copious amounts of water, coffee, and diet coke. If that doesn’t work, I know where to go! This blog http://dailyfatspiration.tumblr.com is sure to make me loose any appetite. Please do not misunderstand, I don’t hate fat people, I just am scared to end up that way. If I see a fat person, I loose all appetite. All i need is something like the pic below to loose any desire to eat.
Eating disorders are so misunderstood in today’s culture. Some people glamorize them, claiming they will make you happy. Others will post extreme pictures, claiming they totally ruin your life. I would have to disagree with both. I have had ed’s since middle school. While it has effected my life, I still live a great quality existence. I am now in my early 20’s and want to explain to people how my life works around anorexia. This is not a how to do guide, but it is up to you on how you wish to use the information.